Naming boys is hard. We had this struggle with Connor too – we each had a list (you might remember some of the spectacular names on my husband’s list, which is how we came to refer to this fetus as Hector) but the number of real contenders was few. When he was born, it took us three days and literally going through every name in the baby name book to settle on Connor (which was our first choice all along, but one needs to be sure about these things, you know…).
I again have a list, this time on my iPad. Some of the names have carried over from the last list, but mostly not. My list is fairly long — 23 names as of today — yet none of them feels like the right one. My husband has a list too and every once in a while we sit down and compare.
Our conversations tend to go like this:
Me: “How about this name?”
Him: “That name sounds like someone from the days of yore.”
Me: “What? What kind of a criticism is that? Oh, fine…”
Him: “How about Cicero?”
Me: [Sigh.]
Or like this:
Him: “What about this ‘E’ name?”
Me: “If we used that name his initials would spell ERF.”
Him: “Yarif? Why would you want to name a baby Yarif?!”
Me: “Not Yarif! ERF. You know – E.R.F.”
Him: “Oh good! I thought you were suggesting a name that sounds like barf.”
You can see why we don’t have these conversations very often.
Aside from the obvious communication problems, part of our trouble is that we have so many criteria when choosing a boy name:
- It can’t be one syllable. (Rich, despite having chosen to go by that name, hates having a short first name and a short last name.)
- It can’t start with F. (A first name and last name that both start with F just sounds too…cute.)
- It can’t start with R. (This one is possibly flexible, but with a Rich and a Robin already it seems like another R name would be overdoing it.)
- It can’t be a name in any way linked to any pop culture reference ever in the history of time. (This is my husband’s rule – “That’s too X-Men.” “That makes me think of Logan’s Run.” If I’d known it would be this much of an issue I’d have prohibited him from watching movies when we first got together 14 years ago.)
Those criteria limit the possibilities quite significantly, but then we run into issues with our last name. With a name like Farr, any name that relates to distance or travelling or similar becomes quite twee.
Walker Farr. Parker Farr. Miles Farr. Hunter Farr.
Sigh. Nope.
(The only good thing about this is that my husband jokes about wanting to name a child Hijk (pronounced Hike) but Hike Farr doesn’t work either, thank goodness.)
Then there’s anything that rhymes with fart. Carter would inevitably become Carter Farter.
Names that echo the sound of our last name don’t really work for a similar reason.
Archer… Farrcher. Hardy…Farrdy.
You just know it’s going to happen.
We’re now three weeks (give or take) from having to figure this out, but no pressure, right?
Maybe Connor is right and we are going to name him Hector after all.
Well, Hector Farr has a ring to it!!!
We were the opposite with the short versus long names. We were determined to give both boys one-syllable names & did well with #1. #2 was hard. We scoured the Internet. And he ended up with a 2-syllable name, so there.
I cannot wait to hear what you name the baby!
(I am liking names like Micah, Jacob and Caleb)
Except Jacob would be Jake, and that contravenes one of our rules.
I like Caleb too. Can’t steal Micah, though – someone else has dibs on it.
We’ll know soon enough what this one will be. Exciting!
We had a vote in the delivery room when he was born.
yup, we heard of this name 2 weeks before I went into labour. We did the “initial check” the “funny name” check “the potential rhyme check”…and we were all good.
When you see that babe you’ll know exactly what his name will be. It took my girlfriend almost a week before her and her husband picked a name!
That’s too funny. But I love how you find something that’s just right. I’m hoping that happens this time because I’m not totally sold on most of the ones on our list.
Love this post! We had similar conversations before H was born & were challenged by Chris’ last name as well. So much for Quinn! When I went into he hospital we had “settled” on a name. But when it was revealed that H was a boy at the delivery, I immediately said, “I don’t want to call him that anymore!” It’s funny how hard naming a child is & I agree especially a boy.
There are so many girls names that I liked, but boys names? Meh. I had a hard time finding ones that I liked. Plus, each of my kids’ names have meaning to it, four boys names that we both liked and agreed on, with meaning? Next to impossible. I was better off naming them Things 1, 2, 3, and 4!
I can’t imagine naming 4 boys, but you did a great jobs. Love their names.
I know what you are going through – our last name is 4 letters as well and so our criteria in naming our kids required multiple syllables too.
Our girl name was much easier but we struggled with the boy name – we ended up going with Anderson (as a first name) and we get tons of compliments on it.
That’s a great name to go with a short last name. Do you care whether he ends up being called Andy? That’s the struggle I have with so many longer names – too many nickname possibilities (some of which end up short and there goes the attempt not to give him a short first name).
No pressure! One of our kids went without a name for almost 2 weeks!! Sometimes it’s hard to see clear in the postpartum blur and agree while swimming in the postpartum fog!
And OK, I know you’re not postpartum yet but we clearly couldn’t decide before either
In the end, you’ll love the name you choose and Hector can be called Baby (or Hector) until then!
Connor really, really wants him to be called Hector. It will be interesting to see how he reacts when we do select a name.
We didn’t have that many issues with boy names. We had Jonah picked out at the same time Noah was born and always knew that we’d name a second son Jonah. Now girl names? That’s another story. I’m sure if I was pregnant with a little girl we’d be in the same situation because for whatever reason most girl names either make me think of a movie character or someone from school that I didn’t like, etc. I’m sure when that sweet baby boy arrives and you get to meet him that you guys will settle on something.
Oh yeah, that would be tough with girl names. But I do have lots of boy names that I couldn’t use because of some kid I didn’t like too.
OMG. This is where we are too. I wonder if it’s just choosing a second name for the same sex that’s hard. Because I feel like once we both eliminated everything we wouldn’t have (top 10 popularity, named after anyone in either family, bratty kids I taught, alliteration…) we had the one. And now we need another girls’ name. Crap.
Yep. I’m hoping that he turns out to be clearly someone else. I’m still having a hard time picturing a baby who isn’t Connor, so definitely looking forward to meeting this one. He will get a name, and it will be interesting to see where we end up.
This is my copy-and-paste baby boy name list. Ignore the ones you’ve already mentioned! I think you guys will pick out something perfect… you very clearly care enough to try <3
Tucker Porter 3.Liam Rhett
2.Griffin Cale Trey Aries
Kellan Merrick Nicolai Zaine
Pierce Trace Cody Jarrett
London 4.Mason Brant 1. Beckett
Rider Ash Corin Ronan
Tyce Hunter Bowen Colby
Emerson Britt Holden Quentin
Hayes *Kohen* *Jude*
Good luck! I can't wait to hear what you choose!
Great list! Some of those are ones I really like too. I just saw Kellan in a baby name book today, actually. It’s a bit too close to another family member’s name though, but it is a nice one!
We had a heck of a time naming our daughter. It’s a task that really shouldn’t be taken lightly. I think you’re going about it the right way.
Agreed. And I definitely want to meet him first.
Its SO hard! We had a tough time too! Can’t wait to hear what you decide!