Four

I’m too sharp with him sometimes. Too impatient.

“Mama?”

“Yes, love?”

He’s talkative lately.

“Mama?”

“Yes?”

Especially early in the day.

“Mama?”

By the eighth time on a too-early morning, I’ve moved on to “hmm?” And after two days, during which he has called for my attention countless times, I resort to a curt, “What?!”

Just say it, my duck. I’m listening to you, so just say it. I don’t want to have to acknowledge you every single time you want to say something to me when I’m sitting right there.

He deserves more from me. He’s four, and sometimes I forget that. And then I get frustrated and impatient and I don’t pay attention enough and he tries harder and I snap at him. And all of a sudden there he is in front of me – my boy who’s only four, which really isn’t very big at all.


 

Comments

  1. ((Robin)) we all are guilty.

  2. MellieMom says:

    I am the same way. After a few of those Mamas I usually say ‘I’m. Right. Here!’ The guilt for not having more patience is what is so exhausting.
    Love that you call him Duck. Haven’t heard that one. xo

  3. Oh, my. This really resonates.

  4. I am guilty of this too. I catch myself afterwards and it just makes me feel horrible for not having more patience to begin with. I’m working on it, but there are those days where it’s just really hard.

    • Yep. It’s hardest for me when I’m tired and in the early mornings. This is such a hard one to stop doing, even when you’ve posted on your blog about it. (Ahem.)

  5. Been there, done that. More than I should. Even once is more than we should. This mothering thing is hard. Sigh.

  6. I love that you give us little reminders like this. Sometimes I need them

  7. My daughter is almost 11 and STILL does that – “Mom? Hey mom? Mom? Hey, mom, guess what?”
    I do it, too, though – get sharp with her from time to time. We’re only human. ;)

  8. Hugs. This resonated really strongly with me. I do the same thing. Just tell me. I am listening. Sometimes I have to stop what I am doing to make sure that she knows I have her full attention.

  9. Guilty. So guilty.

  10. Get out of my head, please. This was me. All week last week. Noah’s 4, too and he is at the same “Mama…mama…mama x 8,000″ phase. Hugs girl. But know you aren’t alone.

    • 4 is just a really, really hard age. But I’m going to counter this with a nice post about him next. I feel like I need to. :)

  11. I’m late to the party on this one, but I had to comment. I lived this very thing — my son is ENDLESSLY talking, until it pounds into my ears — and I finally trained myself to say, reflexively!!, “I’m listening,” any time he says “Mom?” “And Mom?” “Hey Mom” usually in the middle of a story I was actually listening to. It’s interesting because if I am NOT actually listening — focusing on some small task with my hands, usually — I don’t get the trigger to say it, and then Zack says, “MOM! You’re NOT LISTENING!” And he’s right. : ) Takes about six months for the “I’m listening” habit to be ingrained, but it really works. And I think there’s nothing nicer to say to our children then, “I’m here, I’m present, I’m listening to what you say.”

    • That’s great advice, Stacy. I need to work on that because you’re right that being present and listening and having them know that is so important.

  12. Thank you for your honest post. It is true, you are not alone. I had one of those days today, too. When my patience was thin and I answered/spoke in a way with my kid(s) I later regretted. They are so little, and they don’t know any better and we have all of this stuff.. stuff to do..to be..to make..to think about. Arrgh. Oh Parenting truly is the toughest job in the world. Somehow all of the heart aches and impatience and frustration of the day melt away when I see my kiddos finally asleep at night, all snuggled up so sweet as can be.